Should I Get a Divorce?

Editor’s Note: The following is customized from a two-part FamilyLife Today^® collection with writer and theologian Wayne Grudem. You can take heed to the podcast right here: “Should I Get a Divorce?”

You’ve reached a deeply painful place in your marriage the place you’re asking, “Should I get a divorce?” 

This is a tough judgment name that requires consideration of your particular person scenario with the steering of clever, biblical counsel. We’ll speak extra about what this seems to be like later. For now, let’s have a look at some guiding rules as we search to use what the Bible says about divorce.

When ought to I keep married?

God’s intention for marriage is a everlasting, lifelong union between one man and one girl. That’s the best we should always work for.

But in some instances, the best feels out of attain. Maybe it’s an habit to playing, alcohol, medication, or pornography. Whatever it’s, you’ve tried time and again to repair it, and haven’t seen a lot change. It takes prayer for discernment to know when that’s the case.

I’m not arguing for divorce for every kind of causes, like if the husband and spouse can’t agree on one thing concerning the kids or actions or how one can handle their funds. That’s a time to stay it out, work at understanding, and transfer towards one another with as a lot outdoors assist as potential. 

Sometimes, separation can result in change and repentance. In instances the place the husband and spouse nonetheless have the chance to make their marriage work, they need to attempt to try this first. If one partner refuses to even speak through the separation, then the wedding has been deserted, and divorce might be the professional possibility.

Should I get a divorce?

In 1 Corinthians 7:15, Paul says, “if the unbelieving accomplice separates, let or not it’s so. In such instances the brother or sister will not be enslaved” (emphasis added). 

What instances would Paul take note of that may harm a marriage as a lot as adultery or desertion by a partner? These are conditions that require clever consideration: abuse, abuse of kids, extended verbal and relational cruelty, credible threats of great bodily hurt or homicide, and incorrigible drug or alcohol habit.

Those who don’t maintain this place are vulnerable to leaving the abused partner in a scenario of enslavement. And Paul says, “In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved.” That’s the one place within the Bible that marriage is talked about when it comes to slavery. 

So Paul is saying that to remain in these conditions is like slavery, and God doesn’t need to depart a partner in that slave scenario.